### Freeze Them All, Let Gore Sort Them Out! (political cartoon)

Crossposted from Town Called Dobson

click to enlarge

Let me tell you about the time I got kicked out of Sunday School back when I was 15 years old.

The church my parents went to was one of those bible-thumping, ultra conservative, Southern Baptist churches. Imagine the most anti-intellectual environments you can think of and this church was it. Sunday School was no better. My problem was I asked questions.

During the teacher's lesson on Noah's flood, I asked where all the water went. "What water, Stormy?""After the flood receded, where did it go?""It is in the ice caps." That answer didn't sit well with me since I knew that if you melted ALL the ice, everywhere, the ocean level would rise less than 100 feet (thank-you Carl Sagan), so if the entire world was flooded by water by God, where did the rest of the water go?

"God took it."

A little geometry - so if the planet had a diameter of 10 miles to account for rising sea levels... find the volume for the sphere... now subtract the original volume of planet Earth, that should leave us with the volume of water that fell on Noah.

Damn that is a big number. That is a sphere a tad smaller than our moon.

The Sunday School teacher had a novel way of explaining things, God took it, God hid it - "Stormy, God made the fossils." But her final solution for me was to tell my parents, "You will need to stop bringing Stormy to Sunday School, he is too disruptive."

Don't get me started on intelligent design.

P.S. Most people draw penguins to be cute and adorable. I tried to do that, but mine turned out to look psychotic, which kind of adds something to the strip. I mean look at them! They need a good meal of krill soaked in Zoloft.

P.P.S. Super-duper Mega Hat Tip to GregFlynn over at BlueNC. He reminded me flightless birds are a product of evolution!

##### Re: Freeze Them All, Let Gore Sort Them Out!

Thanks for the shout-out.  I'll catch 'em, you fry 'em.

by gregflynn 2006-12-01 04:49AM | 0 recs
##### Re: Freeze Them All, Let Gore Sort Them Out! (poli

::cackle::

Greg, you so rock.

by stormbear 2006-12-01 04:50AM | 0 recs
##### Re: Freeze Them All, Let Gore Sort Them Out! (poli

by Anglico 2006-12-01 06:06AM | 0 recs
##### Re: Freeze Them All, Let Gore Sort Them Out!

Boy, I hope they don't decide Jesus is "of the devil"  :(

by momoaizo 2006-12-01 07:20AM | 0 recs
##### Why

Is he a flightless seabird, too?

Wouldn't put it past him, tho.  He's a tricksy one.

by Ugluks Flea 2006-12-01 08:30AM | 0 recs
##### Re: Freeze Them All, Let Gore Sort Them Out! (poli

Ha ha, Zoloft krill. Where can I get some of that?

Thanks for the Sunday school story.

"Teacher, what happened to your capacity for rational thought?" "God took it."

by billybob 2006-12-01 06:13PM | 0 recs
##### Re: Freeze Them All, Let Gore Sort Them Out! (poli

My Sunday school teachers husband was an instructor at the local community college for computer programming.

That SOB banned me from the computer lab! He was ticked off when he was reading through my disks and found out I figured out how to encrypt Apple II floppy disks.

::cackle::

by stormbear 2006-12-01 07:05PM | 0 recs