Field Negroe's Racism Quiz

The Field-Negroes Racism Quiz
Folks consider this post a self improvement exercise from the field-negro. Yes, it's the Oprahization[sic] of the field-negroe's blog. I am going to give you a little pop quiz to help you realize if you are a racist or to help you recognize racism when you see it.

This is necessary because black folks are always crying racism, and white folks are always saying that they are not. Now this is no ordinary quiz, it comes from years of experience as a field-negro, and extensive interviews conducted with my black and white friends. (Honest white folks by the way, who are not afraid to tell the field-negro how they really feel)

Ok, here goes. And no peeking at the answers.

1. You - a black person- are invited to a picnic being thrown by some white co-workers to celebrate your birthday. As you enter the picnic area, displayed prominently on the main picnic table, are rows and rows of fresh juicy watermelons. Your white co workers are racist. True or False.

2. You- a black female- are sitting behind your desk at your very corporate job, when a white co-worker comes behind you and starts rubbing the top of your head. They then declare; I just love how that feels. This co-worker is a racist. True or False.

3. You -a black person- are at a party with all white people when the DJ starts playing some old Prince tunes. The white party goers all turn to you and ask you to bust a move. They are racist. True or False.

4. You -a black person- are asked to show your ID by the cashier after making a purchase with your American Express gold card. The cashier is a racist. True or False.

5. You-a black person- approach an elderly couple sitting in their car waiting on the light to change. As you get closer you notice that they lock their car doors. They are racist. True or False.

6. You-a black person- are sitting on a plane and bored out of your mind. The white passenger sitting next to you--- in an attempt to be accommodating offers you the sports section of his "USA Today". He is a racist. True or False.

7. You- a black person- are sitting at the light in your brand new Chrysler 3000, when a young white boy pulls up next to you; his tape blasting a rap song with the word n***r in every sentence. This white boy is a racist. True or False.

8. A white person is watching the NBA finals, and he is secretly wishing that there could be just a few more white starters on each team. This white person is a Racist. True or False.

9. A white person notices that the for sale sign on his white neighbor's lawn is gone. He goes outside to check it out, and see an older black lady with about seven young black males unloading furniture from the back of a pick up truck. She explains to him that these are her seven grandsons, and that thanks to a section 8 grant, she will be moving in right next to him. He immediately heads inside to contact your real estate agent. This white person is a racist. True or false.

10. A white person subscribes to the 12% rule. If he attends any public venue and more than 12% of the people there are black; he immediately make plans to leave. This white person is a racist. True or False.

Answers:

1. FALSE: White people love watermelons too. Don't be so sensitive. Now if someone at the picnic had said: Hey look it's field-negro, look at the nice watermelons we got you field-negro, help yourself. Well, that would have been racist.

2. TRUE: Not only is this co-worker racist, they are dumb too. Actions like that can lead to an ass kicking. NEVER EVER touch a black females hair without permission. Heck, her man or husband can't touch her hair without her permission.

3. FALSE: So they think you can dance because you are black, that's no big deal. Being able to dance is a good thing. (Now shuffling, that's a different story)

4. FALSE: If the cashier asked the white person in front of you for ID too. TRUE: If they did not
(That was a freebie question, you can have no wrong answer here)

5. FALSE: Those old white people aren't racist, they are just smart.

6. TRUE: Big time racist. He assumes that all black people want to read about is sports. Why didn't he give you the business page?

7. FALSE: If you have a problem with young white boys vibing to rap songs with the word n***r in it, get on the black rappers who write the lyrics.

8. FALSE: You best believe I wish like hell there were more brothers starting in the NHL. And unless it's a Philly team, I always cheer for the team with the most brothers. So I can't knock the white guy for doing the same thing. He cheered for Bird, I cheered for Magic. No harm no foul.

9. FALSE: Seven young males, and a grandmother! Heck; I don't care if they are black, white, yellow, or brown. I would have been calling my real estate agent too.

10. TRUE: That was a give away question just in case the quiz is too tough for you.

So how did you do? If you got between 8-10 right you are a race expert.
Jessie should call you first before he makes a move.

If you got between 5-8 right keep working on it you are getting there.

If you got 3-5 right you might have some issues. This blog should be required reading for you on a daily basis.

And if you got less than 3 right, well, there is always the republican party. (I kid I kid)

Tags: black, Common Sense, friends, racism, Republicans, WHITE (all tags)

Comments

5 Comments

Re: Field Negroe's Racism Quiz


1. FALSE:
PR: Agreed in general. The employees would be a little ignorant if this was in the south and most of the employees are native southerner. Also it would depend on if they have used watermelons in the past at other company events.

2. TRUE: Not only is this co-worker racist, they are dumb too. Actions like that can lead to an ass kicking. NEVER EVER touch a black females hair without permission. Heck, her man or husband can't touch her hair without her permission.

PR: I would say dumb more than racist. The person is simply clueless and lacks social skills.

3. FALSE: So they think you can dance because you are black, that's no big deal.

PR: If they did this in general to most black people, then I would say TRUE. But then again, it would depend on how the employee conducted himself in the past. I know in companies I worked at, black employees would highlight this fact in a joking way. If the guy is like Stanley in The Office, then I would suggest people shut up about the dancing thing.

5. FALSE: Those old white people aren't racist, they are just smart.
PR: TRUE. If the black guy is dressed well and looks educated, then racist. If he honestly fits their stereotype of a mugger, then I may give the old people a pass.

6. TRUE: Big time racist. He assumes that all black people want to read about is sports. Why didn't he give you the business page?
PR: FALSE: The guy offered the paper on his own. Maybe it is an unfair stereotype, but it was a good gesture, nevertheless.  If he were truly racist, he woudln't offer anything.

9. FALSE: Seven young males, and a grandmother! Heck; I don't care if they are black, white, yellow, or brown. I would have been calling my real estate agent too.
PR: TRUE: I doubt he wou;d have if they were white.

I agree with the rest.

by Pravin 2006-06-08 08:21PM | 0 recs
Re: Field Negroe's Racism Quiz

3. FALSE: So they think you can dance because you are black, that's no big deal. Being able to dance is a good thing. (Now shuffling, that's a different story)

The real racism is assuming that a white guy can't dance just because he's white.

4. FALSE: If the cashier asked the white person in front of you for ID too. TRUE: If they did not
(That was a freebie question, you can have no wrong answer here)

I think it depends on how the people in question are dressed.  If you're asking for ID for a black man who's very shabbily dressed but not a white man in business attire, then maybe the cashier is suspicious because the guy is dressed like he doesn't have a lot of money, not because he's black.

7. FALSE: If you have a problem with young white boys vibing to rap songs with the word n***r in it, get on the black rappers who write the lyrics.

Some of those white boys probably think/wish they were black, so yeah, they're probably not racist.

8. FALSE: You best believe I wish like hell there were more brothers starting in the NHL. And unless it's a Philly team, I always cheer for the team with the most brothers. So I can't knock the white guy for doing the same thing. He cheered for Bird, I cheered for Magic. No harm no foul.

People who claim that NASCAR is a sport, however, probably are racist.

9. FALSE: Seven young males, and a grandmother! Heck; I don't care if they are black, white, yellow, or brown. I would have been calling my real estate agent too.

Yeah, most people don't want to live next door to a grandmother living with her seven grandsons (who probably have some issues because their parents can't/won't care for them, and who the grandmother probably has no control over) on a Section 8 grant.  To the previous poster, if the kids looked like meth addicts, yeah, he would probably call his real estate agent.

by Tom 2006-06-09 02:47AM | 0 recs
Re: Field Negroe's Racism Quiz

As a white, female teacher in an "inner city" school and a resident of a "multicultural" neighborhood, I enjoyed the quiz and comments.

3. You -a black person- are at a party with all white people when the DJ starts playing some old Prince tunes. The white party goers all turn to you and ask you to bust a move. They are racist. True or False.

Anyone that listens to all male music is a sexist.

6. You-a black person- are sitting on a plane and bored out of your mind. The white passenger sitting next to you--- in an attempt to be accommodating offers you the sports section of his "USA Today". He is a racist. True or False.

Maybe it's a male thing.

8. A white person is watching the NBA finals, and he is secretly wishing that there could be just a few more white starters on each team. This white person is a Racist. True or False.

I wish there were more women in sports.

9. A white person notices that the for sale sign on his white neighbor's lawn is gone. He goes outside to check it out, and see an older black lady with about seven young black males unloading furniture from the back of a pick up truck. She explains to him that these are her seven grandsons, and that thanks to a section 8 grant, she will be moving in right next to him. He immediately heads inside to contact your real estate agent. This white person is a racist. True or false.

OMG, seven big strong boys next door to help me move furniture, lift heavy things, and mow my lawn. Thank the Lord for those section 8 grants.

by misscee 2006-06-09 05:19AM | 0 recs
Re: Field Negroe's Racism Quiz

OK ok I will amend # five. If the black person approaching the car is properly dressed and the old people still locked their doors; well, they might be racist.

So if you marked TRUE for that one, give yourself a point.

FN  

by field negro 2006-06-10 02:45PM | 0 recs
Re: Field Negroe's Racism Quiz

What's a black person?  What's a white person?

Those who mistakenly think that there is a white race and/or a black race are - ummm, ahh - racists by definition.

I enjoyed the quiz and the comments but it is very sad that the world is divided by false claims.

- An African-American appearing on Nightline was driven to drink by the finding from DNA testing that he had no identifiable sub-Saharan African ancestry.

- The KKK offers a certificate to any member whose DNA tests entirely European.  Very few qualify. I have suggested David Duke and his brothers might want to buy multi-colored sheets for their next cross burning.

- The DNA tests using biomarkers for ancestry are not 100% reliable but exceed the normal 95% confidence interval for accuracy.  Perhaps needless to say, geography itself is only a marker for race.

Besides the obvious, one tragedy of this is that medicine is infected with racism.  For example, children of  South Asian ancestry are often excluded from early diagnosis of the "Caucasian Disease," cystic fibrosis.  Doctors don't generally realize that their dark-skinned patients are predominantly Caucasian.

Yeah, we live in a society that makes senseless and harmful distinctions.  We have to live in the real world.

Pity.

Good that science must and will change superstition.

Sad it takes so long.  

by terryhallinan 2006-06-10 03:47PM | 0 recs

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