Can a Feminist Be a Misogynist?

Warning: pedantry ahead. Let's distinguish between misogyny, misandry, and sexism. Misogyny is hatred and disdain for women in general. Misandry, hatred and disdain for men in general, is probably the most underused word in political debate. Although a lifelong feminist, I have always loathed  knee-jerk male-bashing and defended men against stereotyping all my life. Wikipedia has a decent definition of sexism: "Sexism is commonly considered to be discrimination and/or hatred of people based on their sex rather than their individual merits."

I struggle greatly with my own misogyny. I was much more comfortable being the only girl in my political science classes at Fordham than attending an all girls Catholic College in my freshman year. I credit my 5 younger brothers and 5 young uncles. My four daughters might have contributed to the misogyny too:) Working in the women-dominated fields of librarianship and social work has been a terribly bad fit for me with dire economic consequences.

I am far more confident that men will like me than women will like me. I don't do tact. If I see a group of 5 men at a party, I know they need me:) All my shrinks have been men. I have done my best therapy  work with male clients. One client told me I must have been a gay male in a previous lifetime since I understood him so well:) The real explanation was that manic depressive closets resemble gay closets.

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Racism is four to twelve times worse than sexism

Every time I come to mydd I see at least one diary complaining about sexism.  Hillary is a woman, the argument goes. And Hillary lost. Ergo, Hillary must have lost because she's a woman.  While I would argue that there were several excellent reasons to oppose Hillary, I still agree that it's inevitable that any woman running for the presidency would have been faced with sexism.  However considering that Hillary was white and her main opponent was African American, the argument that she was the one discriminated against flies out the window.

A few facts below:

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Nice Spot to Eat After Golf, but Gov. Janet Napolitano ( Obama supporter) is Barred

I apologize deeply for my 3rd diary today; I try to be diligent about waiting till after midnight. But I'm a mama's boy, I deeply deeply respect my mother and women.

My mother was a late bloomer in the “work field”, we come from a fairly wealthy family. But after she put us through school ( home maker), she started her 1st job at almost 47. She put into it the same heart and diligence as she did into us and finally left the company as the CFO (mutli billion Dollar Company). All along she taught us , “ if you don't as boys and men learn to respect what you perceive as the weaker sex in the macho world, you son have not learnt how to garner the real strength a man is measured by" .

Well no less than many of you here who feel the same .

So when I saw this article in NY times I was and perhaps overreacting, simply livid.

So to the point_do you watch the Masters (golf)? Now read the treatment in our US of A clubs today in the name of ''Hey its a private club' we keep them kind of folks out' ( when was the last time we heard this language?)

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Where's the outrage?

The single most significant example of sexism in the primary campaign was the John Edwards haircut story.

I say it was sexist because a woman getting a $400 haircut wouldn't even have been a blip on the radar--it was only because he was a man that it was such a big story. He was called things like "prettyboy" because of that story.

I say it was the most significant example of sexism because I guarantee you that story got more minutes of media play than all the examples in the NOW list combined. And I guarantee you it had a more negative impact on Edwards campaign than all the examples on the NOW list combined had on Clinton's campaign.

So where's the outrage? Why did NOW fail to even mention THAT story?

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Obama Can Do Anything The White Kids Can Do

Most racism, sexism is unconscious.

Yesterday, Obama said this, in (what I believe was) a sincere effort to be more inclusive toward women:

Obama thanked Clinton and said she had broken barriers and served as a lesson to his daughters that women can do anything the boys can do "and do it better, and do it in heels" and he echoed the call for unity, while also hailing the influence and successes of her husband.

Let's separate this out a bit. Now I know some naysayers will say this is nitpicking, go ahead.

First let's take "women can do anything the boys can do." Flip it into a comment about race. To complete the exercise, let's pretend Hillary and Bill Clinton are godparents to two children whose mother is Maggie Williams. To take it a step further, let's pretend Hillary's husband is African American, and was never president:

Obama has proved to my African American godchildren that black adults can do anything the white kids can do.

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