BUSHIES WAGE ULTIMATE WAR ON XMAS -- SANTA SENT TO GUANTANAMO

Reprinted from The Satirical Political Report http://satiricalpolitical.com

In a bizarre combination of the War on Terror and the War on Christmas, the Bush Administration today canceled this year's Yuletide celebration, after arresting Santa Claus for aiding and abetting terrorism, and designating him as an enemy combatant.

Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez announced that Old St. Nick had been tracked by the FBI for some time, since he fit the classic terrorist profile: a bearded holy man who took flying lessons, repeatedly entered and left this Country without a passport, and controlled a tightly knit cell of subordinates who manufacture concealed packages - that Santa delivers to his network in the dark of night.

Gonzalez further stated that based on warrantless intercepts of phone calls and emails between the North Pole and Detroit, Michigan, U.S. authorities were able to uncover Santa's "naughty and nice" lists, that implicated him in various Al-Qaeda related activities.

The AG also asserted that the final nail in the jolly fat man's coffin was provided by satellite photos, which caught Osammy kissing Santa Claus.

CONTINUED at: http://satiricalpolitical.com/?p=470

There's more...

THE WHO'S NEW ROCK OPERA: 'BUSHY' - - FEATURING 'PINHEAD LIZARD'

Reprinted from The Satirical Political Report http://satiricalpolitical.com

Ever since he was a young boy
He had a silver spoon
From Greenwich down to Midland
That's where he learned to moon
But I ain't seen nothing like him
In any skid row saloon
That deaf, dumb and blind kid
Sure is a mean buffoon

He stands like a statue
Part of the Neo-Con machine
Constitution in the dumper
Likes big oil, not green or clean
Plays by faith-based intuition
The Mid-East countries fall
That deaf, dumb and blind kid
Sure is a mean goofball

CONTINUED at:http://satiricalpolitical.com/?p=437

There's more...

BUSH RULES OUT 'GRACEFUL EXIT' - FOR HIMSELF AND CHENEY

Reprinted from The Satirical Political Report http://satiricalpolitical.com

Addressing the increasing violence and chaos in Iraq, President Bush announced today that there would no "graceful exit" for U.S. troops, and also, more significantly, no "graceful exit" from office for either the Vice President or himself.

"We're gonna' stay until the job gets done," Bush insisted, "regardless of any timetables for the next Presidential election." Bush added that he couldn't even gracefully exit China when he tried, so why expect him to leave a nice cushy job like President.

Bush further asserted that according to a secret opinion given to him by Attorney General Gonzales, Bush had the power during wartime to suspend the Twenty-Second Amendment to the Constitution -- governing term limits for Presidents - along with the First, Fourth, Fifth and Sixth Amendments as well.

The President contended "that we'd be sending the wrong message to the terrorists if Cheney and I just `cut and run,' just like the Democrat party wants us to do."

CONTINUED at: http://satiricalpolitical.com/?p=441

There's more...

Clarification of the Uses of Impeachment

...We have seen a great deal of nitpicking as to what constitutes a high crime and misdemeanor, but it is obvious from the context that one of the greatest high crimes and misdemeanors is a breach of public trust...

There's more...

Impeachment is Not about Getting Revenge

...Nothing could have denigrated the office of the President more than letting a liar; thief and crook walk away from his crimes, unpunished...

There's more...

Diaries

Advertise Blogads