No, politeness vs rudeness has nothing to do with Orwell. Everything to do with proper-vs-improper familiarity.

Someone can't be polite/rude/offensive to him/herself. Another person can however be polite/rude/offensive to them.

Therefore I can be offended by words you say to me, even though I would not be offended if I said the same things about myself.

Is this now plain enough for you to understand?

Really, the concept of improper familiarity is hardly a new one.