Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

Wow--honest to goodness, smart MyDD meta. I never thought I would see the day! Funny stuff. I'd make sure to add several more comments questioning the motives of anyone disagreeing with you--Chris

It's kind of a hassle to have to write the same old comments over and over.

So I'm thinking...why not have a pull-down menu that we could select a comment from?

I'll take a number 32, please!

Suggested Items for the Comment Menu:

1. It's no mystery why Clinton is leading in the polls - people LIKE Clinton.

2. I seriously don't know anybody who likes Clinton.

3. Edwards is clearly the most progressive of the big three.

4. Edwards is actually the least progressive of the big three.

5. Obama has the least substance.

6. Obama has the most substance.

7. Gore would make the best president.

8. We must draft Gore.

9. Clark would make the best president.

10. Get over it, neither Gore nor Clark will run.

11. Richardson is the one to watch.

12. Above all, we must STOP Clinton.

13. Why do so many of you hate Clinton?

14. Why do so many of you hate Obama?  

15. Edwards, Edwards, Edwards!  Why so many diaries about Edwards?

16. Clinton has surged even further ahead in the latest poll.

17. Edwards supporters are cranky because he's third in the polls.

18. Edwards is third in the polls because the MSM won't focus on substance.

19.  Edwards is tied with Obama in the polls.

20.  Clinton has fallen in the polls.

21. Obama has gone up in the polls.

22. Obama has fallen in the polls.

23. THAT poll is an outlier.

24. Chill, these early polls don't mean anything.

25. These early polls DO mean something.

26. Clinton has the highest unfavorable rating.

27. People find Obama's message the most appealing.

28. Obama's message hurts Democrats.

29. Obama's rhetoric is empty.

30. I don't trust Edwards.

31. I don't trust Clinton.

32. Come on, they're all great candidates. Stop bashing them!

33. You're naive...NONE of them are great candidates.

34.  YOU'RE the naive one.

35. You're abusing the ratings system.


Tags: meta, satire (all tags)

Comments

34 Comments

Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

LOL!

That's great, thanks!

by College Progressive 2007-04-14 08:50PM | 0 recs
Clearly, they're all true.

by jallen 2007-04-14 08:56PM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

My favorites:

# 23, 13,14,15 followed by 32 and then finally 34.  So there!!!  Blogging is much faster this way.  :-)

by pioneer111 2007-04-14 09:28PM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

12,33,7,8

by Winston Smith 2007-04-14 10:53PM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

Sadly, we need a DIARY menu like that, with the same numbers and text.

by Nonpartisan 2007-04-14 11:16PM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 :-)

by LandStander 2007-04-15 01:58AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

That was very satisfying!

by LandStander 2007-04-15 01:58AM | 0 recs
7!

7 7 7. 8, 7, 7. But 32, too.

by Kal 2007-04-15 07:20AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

A new inmate on death row was somewhat overwhelmed by his new environment. Other inmates on the cell block were calling out numbers which were then followed by raucous laughter from the other inmates. Confused, the new inmate asked the guy in the neighboring cell what was up with the numbers. The neighbor replied, "Well, none of us are expecting to be here very long, so to save time when telling jokes we just numbered them." After a while the new inmate thought he'd give it a try. He called out, "7!" The response was complete silence. The new inmate quietly asked his neighbor what went wrong with his attempted joke. The neighbor replied, "It's all in how you tell it."

by Michael Bersin 2007-04-15 02:45AM | 0 recs
Variant of the numbered-joke bit

An alternate version of this joke that I like -- the system is explained to the new prisoner.  Old prisoner Tom says "27" and all the old prisoners laugh.  Old prisoner Dick says "34" and all the old prisoners laugh.  Old prisoner Harry says "49" and no one laughs.  The new prisoner asks why and is told "That Harry, he just can't do Swedish dialect".

by DaveMB 2007-04-15 07:33AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

Come on, they're all great candidates. Stop bashing them!

by Almanax 2007-04-15 02:50AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!
  1.  Only Edwards can win Iowa.
  2.  Only Clinton has the cash to be elected.
  3.  Only Obama has the momentum to be elected.
  4.  Only assholes talk about electability.
by Bruce Godfrey 2007-04-15 03:34AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

I am dissapointed in your lack of web 2.0 buzzwords in this solution.

My "these criticisims are about unimportant things" would need a web 2.0 inferface otherwise how will I add it?

by sterra 2007-04-15 03:34AM | 0 recs
Wow, frontpaged! I'm honored, thanks
"Nothing to kick away the clouds like a heady sip from the goblet of fame!"
--Niles Crane
by Rob in Vermont 2007-04-15 04:20AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

All of them.

The list isn't MyDD comprehensive and needs more work to truly get that humorless throb so much a part of the experience.

by Rolfyboy 2007-04-15 04:21AM | 0 recs
Clearly, You're Not Eating Your Snarkables!

Humor is where you make it.

by Paul Rosenberg 2007-04-15 05:42AM | 0 recs
Re: Clearly, You're Not Eating Your Snarkables!

Meh, humor is overrated.

by audi100quattro 2007-04-15 06:33AM | 0 recs
We could go on and on...

36. When Edwards supporters blast Obama, it helps Hillary

  1. When Edwards supporters blast Obama, it's good for both candidates and bad for Hillary
  2. You're helping the Republicans
  3. Why are you afraid to debate?

Yeesh, are we all so silly? Of course we are.

by david mizner 2007-04-15 04:35AM | 0 recs
Re: We could go on and on...

40. How much is the Edwards campaign paying you to say that?

by jallen 2007-04-15 11:22AM | 0 recs
41. A cup of coffee and two cinnamon donuts. nt

by BruceMcF 2007-04-15 07:42PM | 0 recs
Re: 41. A cup of coffee and two cinnamon donuts. n

OK, so I lied ... so far I have been buying my own coffee, and don't really make enough at my day job to afford two cinnamon donuts (well, on top of the essentials that I buy ... I'm not saying that I am living a baklava-less existence here).

But if anyone from the Edwards campaign is asking around, please do put it about that I would be willing to argue on their behalf for a cup of coffee and two cinnamon donuts.

And not two donuts from the supermarket either ... two fresh ones from the bakery up the street.

by BruceMcF 2007-04-15 10:10PM | 0 recs
You Forgot 36: All Of The Above!

36 is just the right number for it, too.  It's the square of the first perfect number (6=1+2+3=1*2*3), and the product of the first even square number (4) and the first odd square number (9).

It comprehendeth everything!

by Paul Rosenberg 2007-04-15 05:38AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

36. I'm up on my high horse looking down at folks that are committed and trying to actually do something.

by philgoblue 2007-04-15 06:33AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

Good one, but no one would actually make that comment; it needs to be rephrased:

36. You're on your high horse looking down on those of us trying to actually do something!

There!

by Rob in Vermont 2007-04-15 06:58AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

Right on!!  36 it is.

by pioneer111 2007-04-15 09:10AM | 0 recs
Hilarious

nice list :)

by okamichan13 2007-04-15 07:43AM | 0 recs
Comment Menu!

There's yet another variation of that joke in which the inmates have been in jail for so long that they keep hollering out the same numbers for their stale jokes, 33, 51, 19, 76....  and so on.  

One day somebody yells out 27!, and nobody laughs, except for one jailbird who doubles over, howling with laughter.  One of the other inmates looks at his cellmate and asks, "what's up with that guy?"   And the reply is, "He's never heard that one before."

by global yokel 2007-04-15 07:53AM | 0 recs
Re: Comment Menu!

I always thought it was a group of old comedians who had heard eachothers jokes so many times they created a number system for them, 8, 32, 51, and so on.

One of the relatively "younger" jokesters blurts out, "35!" and there's a deafening silence. Crickets.

"What?" Our guy asks. "I think 35 is really funny!"

"It is," says another. "But the way you tell it..."

by afertig 2007-04-15 08:16AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

This diary is an absolute delight; it deserves to be frontpaged.  In fact I already put it to use:  I opened tha ARG poll diary and simply typed #23!

by pamelabrown 2007-04-15 08:29AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

great post ROFL

by nevadadem 2007-04-15 08:46AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

But what about the standard?

I am Jerome Armstrong.

by Dave Sund 2007-04-15 10:27AM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

The numbers all go to 11. Look, right across the board, 11, 11, 11, and ... Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten.

-Nigel Tufnel from "This Is Spinal Tap"

by BeekerDynasty 2007-04-15 02:35PM | 0 recs
Re: Hey Chris, we need a Comment Menu!

41.  Voting for ___ is the equivalent of voting for Nader

by Valatan 2007-04-15 04:11PM | 0 recs
42.

Just 42. 42 is the answer, its just that we haven't worked out the question yet.

by BruceMcF 2007-04-15 07:44PM | 0 recs

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